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Finding our Way in the Forest

Sometimes we need to simply allow ourselves to get lost in able to find new ways. If we always stick to the same safe path we will end up at the same destination.

This is, of course, useful. But not when we are seeking out change.

I mean, we notice the changes that happen in the forest if we walk the same path over and over again.. if we are walking slow enough, observing closely enough and listening deeply enough the path is never exactly the same.


When I intended to get lost I had to ready myself for it.

And I failed miserably the first few times. Because my senses heightened and for some reason the sun, the sound of the lake, and the smells of the forest were informing me of where I was - and I didn't let go of that until I was forced to on a cold, cloudy, still day. It was almost like the forest noticed I was struggling to dare to get lost and helped me by removing all those sensory clues.


But I think that's what we do all the time, look for clues that help us keep with the familiar rather than notice the new and the subtle differences that can offer paths of change.

I sometimes seek out words in other languages to see how they look and how they sound. I noticed that the Sanskrit word for forest was "jangala" which of course, correctly, I connected to the word jungle. Looking up the etymology of the word I discovered that jangala referred to "waste, wasteland, secluded or unfrequented place, a forest, a desert" - so rather than a word for a tree community ecosystem it is a word that describes the human relationship with the space, and in this case implying a place with no humans.

Just as the word forest in English did not originally mean a tree landscape but a space that was protected by royal decree as hunting grounds and therefore the average person was not permitted to hunt, gather firewood, or chop down timber for housing etc and this could be wetlands, moors and not just wooded areas - see my previous post on this.


What was interesting was discovering another sanskrit word - padapa - which is apparently one of many for tree - and literally means "(he/her who) drinks with (his/her) feet" -after all this is what a tree does.


Getting lost in words, in facts, in discovery and possibility is maybe an essential process to ready ourselves for change?

To take a new direction? Or reach a different location? Or...?

Taking the new direction will not create change if all we are doing is looking to get back onto the path again? If we are consumed with knowing what is familiar and not open to getting to know. I know that when I was lost I became consumed with knowing where exactly I was so that I felt in control. I became obsessed with time, which surprised me a little as I had given myself permission not to worry about that. But the biggest surprise was how afraid I became of meeting another human, especially a male one, well, specifically a male one.

I was alone in the forest.

My entire childhood it was drilled into my head that dreadful things can happen to you as a lone female. Dreadful things could happen if you didn't tell others where you were going.

And there I was lost, not knowing myself where I was. Alone.

And there was a time when the forest felt oppressive - those dark in-betweens felt menacing, the constant movement of a living forest put me on alert. My brain was constantly going through scenarios of what ifs... in a perpetual state of readying... not for something wonderful, or new, but for the dread of childhood past to jump out of the darkness. And despite the urge to keep moving and re-finding the safety of the familiar, I willed myself to stop, to pause and to breathe.

Once again I could hear the rustle of leaves rather than menace and the birds sing songs of encouragement. Things my panic had shut out.

If we want change we need to prepare ourselves. To ready ourselves. To practice overcoming fears of the unknown, and prejudices from the past and cautionary tales told that limit us - or maybe told to limit us?

Because change can't happen if we don't self-regulate all of that. Until we feel brave and dare to get lost it will be impossible to truly discover the alternatives.

Sometimes we will find our way through the forest together, sometimes we will get lost from each other - and maybe its good to ready ourselves to stay in touch when that happens... maybe through sound, or some other signal that works - so that we can still greet each other from far away. Maybe change is not about us all taking the same path, but about co-existing in the forest, with the forest, together?






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